Marijuana
I cannot pinpoint exactly when I started taking intoxicating substances like alcohol, but I do remember tasting it here and there in palm wine given to me by relatives, close neighbours, etc. When I started at the University of Calabar in 2015, I had a group of people I was always with and a particular guy I would tag my bestie at the time. I’ll call him IB for easy communication. IB and I were very close and we practically did everything together in school and we hung out after school hours.
It was in my first year that I remember ever smoking marijuana. It was a late night and IB came to spend the night at my place. He came with marijuana and asked if he could smoke and I obliged. He asked if I wanted to try it out and I did try it out but I felt nothing. At that moment, I wondered what the fuss was about with this drug. Why did everyone think it was so bad when it couldn’t even do anything to me? Time passed and I was frequently in the company of smokers but never smoked but hey! Third party smoking is much worse. I seemed to like the smell and how I felt whenever I was around smokers. At the end of my 2nd year, I was already smoking but not as regularly because I didn’t know who to buy it from and I didn’t know how to roll it. So I would just smoke what came by me and like everything that is bad in the world, I got access to marijuana without spending any money. There were always guys eager to give me weed and roll it for me without my asking. In all of this, I would smoke and still function normally. While others smoked half, I would smoke a full one to get me high, and I always needed more to get me to peak levels.
Eventually, I met a guy whom I started dating. He was a smoker also and wasn’t hiding it at all, as opposed to my previous boyfriend who would excuse himself to smoke. We will call this new boyfriend AY.
AY soon travelled to Abuja and we spoke all the time. When he travelled, he sent me a box of perfume oils, along with some shirts and shoes. Along with the package, he sent me 6 months supply of rolling papers, organic cigarette butts, a crusher and a fresh batch of Arizona (Arizona is a potent grade of marijuana and does not require you to smoke too much to get high). I abused this recklessly as I smoked morning, afternoon and night. I barely went a day without being high and if you think I put a cap on it when I was home, you’re sorely mistaken. I went home once and took some of my stash with me. When I got home for the holidays, I put it in my food and warmed it and was eating it when my mom came and asked to have some of my food. If you see the way I told her ‘No!’, ehn. If it wasn’t my first day at home and it wasn’t my favourite food, I know I would’ve had to explain why.
The addiction began to develop and smoking became part of my daily routine. It was the first thing I did when I woke up in the morning and the last thing I did when I went to bed. I had a roommate too and she also smoked because I influenced her although she wasn’t as bad as me. I soon got connected to a dealer and would buy weed in large amounts and even got some for free too. I was always asking for a better grade, something that would hit harder than the last. I started to mix it with other things, dunk it in alcohol for days before drinking, then smoke while drinking the mixture for full effect. All of this was to fill the gaping hole in my heart caused by rejection, heartbreak and a total disappointment in myself even though nobody ‘appointed’ me in the first place.
Sexual Addiction
I was not only a chronic smoker but also very immoral. Intoxication and sexual immorality always went hand in hand for me. I believe the door to sexual immorality was opened when I was sexually harassed by a neighbour, his brother and his sister. Not all at the same time but at different points in my life. These were seeds sown in my life which brought forth a bountiful harvest. I moved from relationship to relationship, receiving and giving heartbreaks.
I engaged in one-night stands and friends-with-benefits relationships. I was quite careless with my health too but God was merciful as I never got pregnant, although I did have to treat infections severally. He didn’t allow me to reap all the fruits of my labour.
Pornography and Masturbation
I was also bound by pornography and masturbation since I was 13 or so. This was because of exposure to it when I was about 8 years old through one of the aforementioned neighbours who had me watch it as cartoons on his phone then. An insatiable lust for it began to grow and when I was old enough to be on my own, I added it to the numerous sins I committed.
It was in my addiction to marijuana that God stretched out his hands towards me and started to cause an uneasiness in my soul and I began to question life and what my purpose on earth was.
Fighting Drugs… and Losing
The Scripture that says, No one can come to me unless the Father pulls him to Himself, is alive in my heart because I know for a fact that I would’ve never come to know the Lord unless he reached out to grab me. There came a time I became a proper addict, never going a day without smoking. I had withdrawal symptoms if I didn’t smoke in a day. I didn’t want to live in reality at all, it was filled with too much pain and I wanted to escape it all. I could only escape when I was high or when I was sleeping, so I did a lot of both. There was a time I tried to stop smoking. I can’t remember the reason why, but I took all my smoking accessories and tossed them into a ravine behind my house. It didn’t take up to an hour before I went back to the ravine to look for it. It made the scripture that says, “The arm of flesh will fail you” all the more real to me. I tried to stop but in my own strength, and it didn’t work. There was one of my smoking buddies who I made an accountability partner and vice versa so we would both stop smoking but it didn’t work. We just kept lying to each other until we finally came clean.
Because of drugs, I could never put on weight. I weighed almost the same thing for years. I suffered insomnia, cognitive dissonance and frequent coughs amongst other things because of it.
Now I believe the time for my salvation was close by and God put a hold on my finances so I could no longer afford to buy weed. The withdrawal symptoms were brutal and I would regularly scratch my nose, I would be unable to sleep, I was very irritable, and depressed. I was generally alone and stayed indoors the whole time. It was in that time alone that I would consume books and materials on Purpose which led me to read some dark materials, and also eventually, the book that would bring me to my knees and cause me to confess Jesus as Lord.
Witchcraft and the Occult
During that period, I began to read deep things on Purpose which led me to books on enlightenment. It didn’t take long before I was delving into reading and practising meditative postures in a bid to open my “third eye”. I swallowed whole articles on enlightenment. This thirst began after I read one of Dan Brown’s novels. I began to research ancient symbols and everything that was mentioned in the book. I went down this path that seemed like one I could easily come out of but eventually it led me to a book called The Wiccans Book of Witchcraft. When I downloaded the book to read, I started to have this uneasy feeling inside and it was almost like I couldn’t get myself to read the book. There was this battle that kept raging inside of me whenever I reached for the book. I could read other corrupted materials but each time I tried to read it, I’d find something else more fascinating to read. This continued for months and I couldn’t understand why, but now I do. It was God’s heavy hand of restraint on me not to corrupt myself any further. He put a boundary on this knowledge and said you can only come thus far and no more.
It was so bad that I reached out to a guy whom I thought was a serious Christian and asked his take on it but he never responded. This is why as Christians, we must be people who stand for the truth no matter what. I was looking for someone to just tell me not to read it and I would drop it but no one did.
The Night of Choice
On a rather auspicious night in February 2020, the course of my life would change forever. If anyone told me I would encounter the King of kings who would make Himself known to me for the first time in my life that night, I would have laughed and scorned and even said that He didn’t exist. My continuous consumption of forbidden knowledge weakened the little faith I had gathered all my life from my irregular mass attendance and sparse prayers. Prior to this day, for three or more years, I had neither gone on my knees to pray to God for anything, nor had I gone to church. I believed that whatever I needed, I had to work to get it. As no one was coming to save me, I had to save myself. I was a proper unbeliever who lived a borrowed life, oblivious to the One who gave her the life she so recklessly squandered.
I was once again faced with the dilemma of reading the book on witchcraft but this time, it was against a different type of spiritual material: He Came to Set the Captives Free by Rebecca Brown. You see, I first came across Rebecca Brown’s book in my last year in Senior Secondary School, 7 years before that day, while at the boarding house. I began to read it but became very afraid when she began to give details about the demons that affected her spiritual ward’s life. I closed the book and never even remembered it until this time in my life. In my quest for spiritual knowledge, I remembered the book and downloaded it, putting it among the list of materials I would read.
It was at this moment I battled with reading either Rebecca Brown or Wiccans. It was like a battle of wills within me. I like to imagine the war raging in the heavens on that night, and it looked like a bloody fight for my soul in my head. After much struggle, I began to read Rebecca Brown’s book. The first few pages were the source of my fear many years ago, but this time when I read it, I said in my head, “Whatever wants to happen, let it happen now! What have I not seen in this life?”
Rebecca Brown said at the beginning of the book, “The devil does not want you to read this book” and I said, “It’s fine, he should do his worst.” It was like there was this newfound courage in me that I could not explain. I began to read the book at about 6pm in the evening and as I continued to read, the fearful thoughts continued to rage on in my mind but at the same time, I received strength to keep reading. I didn’t know how but I kept on. I kept hearing, “You’ve come this far, keep going, finish it.” This voice was faint but powerful enough to keep me going so I kept on.
As she began to talk about the various things that could serve as an open door to the devil, she mentioned horoscopes, zodiacs, yoga, meditation and the many other things I was practising at the time and I could feel my heart breaking like glass. I held back tears I never knew I still had. In all those years, I never broke down when I was heartbroken from a relationship or when I was withdrawn from school. None of these things were strong enough to make me cry but here I was fighting them back alone in my room.
I continued to read the book even with tears in my eyes. I couldn’t pinpoint why exactly I was crying, I just kept on reading and I remember shaking slightly from time to time.
Challenging God
I finished the book at around 12 am and when I did, all I could do was fall on my knees in tears. I was crying like a baby. I didn’t know what to say or do but I knew that I should call on Jesus. I didn’t know how to pray, I only knew to pray the Catholic way but even that felt wrong. So I began to talk. I said, “Jesus, if you can hear me and if you exist, please help me. I don’t know what I’m doing with my life and I don’t think I want to know any more. I’m tired of trying to figure it out myself, so please take the wheel.” I remembered the words from this song by Carrie Underwood – Jesus Take the Wheel. It was the only “Christian” song that seemed to squeeze itself into my playlist of over 300 songs riddled with hate, violence, lust, and pride.
I said to Jesus, “If you don’t help me, then I’m at my wit’s end and I will take my life because life is not worth living any more.”
Breathing for the First Time
After I said those words, I said I wasn’t going to get up until something happened and I stayed true to those words. Moments after, what seemed like the chilly breeze that only blows underneath the trees in the village at 5 pm rushed into my room. I was sweating while I was reading the book but now, it was like an air conditioner was turned on in my room and I couldn’t understand it. I thought power had been restored so I checked but there was no electricity. I thought maybe it was breeze from outside that came in through my bathroom window but there was nothing like that. I checked my front door but the air was as still as ever and as hot as it was earlier that night. I went back to my position and I continued to wait and suddenly, I raised my head and I felt a heavy load lift from my chest and immediately, I felt a gust of air rush into me. The feeling was like one who was in an airtight room and finally came outside where there was fresh air. I took a deep breath and it seemed like all the air I had been breathing all my life was nothing compared to this breath. I felt like one who was back from the dead. I felt like one who had been long suffocated but could now breathe.
You never know how heavy the load you’re carrying is until you finally put it down. This was my reality that night. I felt a joy that came from within me. It felt like true joy, joy I had never known. I was speechless for minutes and couldn’t believe that that was how Jesus worked. I kept saying, “So this is how this Jesus thing works” with so much amazement. I thought that the feeling would fade so I said I’ll test it. I would go to bed and If I was still as happy in the morning as I was in the night, then I’d know it’s really true, that Jesus is real, so I thought. So I went to sleep so fast like a child whom they just bought new clothes and was permitted to wear them the following day. That was the best sleep of my life.
When I woke up, I was still very happy. I remembered a friend of mine from secondary who looked more like a Christian than anyone else I knew: Sis Aniebiet Umokaso. So I immediately sent her a message telling her I had given my life to Christ. She was happy for me and encouraged me to read my Bible and start from the account of John. I obeyed. As I began to read my Bible, it was like I could finally see too. It seemed like I was discovering words in the Bible I had never seen. I could personalise the things written and I was reading it like it was a personal letter sent to me and me alone. “Jesus must love only me”, I said to myself.
My Baptism in the Holy Spirit
Few days later, Sis Aniebiet would send me books and songs to read and listen to. She told me about the Holy Spirit and said that I could desire the Holy Spirit and the Lord could baptise me Himself if I asked. So the following morning, with much anticipation, I went on my knees at 6 am and asked the Lord to baptise me in the Holy Spirit. I knelt close to my bed and waited and I felt electricity flow through me before I fell on my bed. When I got up, I began to speak in a different tongue. It was almost like I knew what to expect without really knowing.
The days following this experience were phenomenal. I believe I also received prophetic giftings too as I would see in a split second a person about to knock on my door and see myself respond to their requests before they actually knocked. So by the time they eventually knocked, I would just go and get the thing they wanted and present it to them before they asked. I was always met with shocked faces.
One particular day as I was trying to tidy up my room, I remember bending down and seeing a scene play before my eyes, like a movie I had watched before. It was like I was remembering the scene. The problem though was that this had never happened! Rather it happened seconds after! In the vision, I saw my neighbour walk to my door and stand to knock, and I saw him ask for something. Now, I didn’t hear what he said but it seemed I could hear him say what he needed in my mind. It was like I saw his lips move and I knew what he was saying. He was asking me for palm oil. At this time, I was just getting used to experiences. The Holy Spirit was surprising me day after day. So, I walked to the kitchen and picked up the bottle of palm oil.
As I was walking back to the room, I heard a knock on the door. It was my neighbour so I opened the door and just handed the palm oil to him. I think he was wearing the same set of clothes I saw him wearing in the vision. When I handed him the palm oil, he asked me with so much shock, “How did you know?” I didn’t want to respond to him because I didn’t know how to explain to him that I saw him only seconds ago asking for it in my vision so I went ahead of him. He asked again with more seriousness and it just came to my mind to say that it was the Holy Spirit. So I said it with a smile as I closed the door.
I also remember the few times I got on a call with a few old friends. Almost everyone had deserted me at this time so there was barely anyone around me. When someone would call, the only thing I could talk about was Jesus, so I hijacked the conversation most times and talked about Jesus. I remember that I was talking to this guy, let’s call him “Cee”. As the conversation began to tilt towards Jesus, I found that I knew what Cee was about to say in response to what I said before he said it. I would see his lips utter words that he wasn’t physically saying. I could tell what he was saying even if it was not audible and I would hear myself answer him. I could also hear what he was actually saying in the physical, it was like I was keeping up with the two realms at the same time! I would go ahead and say things like, “Oh and you may be thinking that…” And proceed with telling him what I heard him say. So many times I was always the one talking. It felt like the Holy Spirit gave no room for them to ask the questions because He would have me talk about these things before they asked. Truly the Holy Spirit searches hearts and minds and reveals it to whoever He chooses.
Abnormal Ill-health
Another notable thing about my switch from darkness to light was that in subsequent months, I would encounter pure demonic attacks. Shortly after my conversion, COVID hit and I had to travel back to my village in Benue state in March 2020 based on my mother’s instructions. On getting there, it was understandable to me at the time that I would fall sick because each time I changed my environment, I fell sick. However, as the months went by, I began to suspect that my ill health was no longer normal. Few days after I landed in the village, I had a dream where I saw a huge demon walk into my room. It was about 7 feet tall. I started to fight it in the dream but began to feel weak and was eventually beaten. Soon after that, I fell terribly ill again and was sick for the next 3-4 months. My siblings fell ill here and there but mine was very constant. I would have only about 5 days of good health before I would fall terribly ill again and again. At some point, I just stayed ill. I couldn’t move around much and couldn’t eat.
I remember one night when I fell asleep and felt my intestines being twisted, almost like they were mangled up inside my body. I was in severe pain and everyone was asleep. Even when I tried to wake the next person for help, I couldn’t even let out a whimper. I managed to reach for the bottle of water next to me, I prayed over the water and asked the Lord to reach my organs and cause the pain to seize. Then, I drank the water. I don’t remember if I rebuked anything but as I drank the water, I felt my intestines loosen immediately and I felt relief and was able to sleep. At a point, medications stopped working. It didn’t matter if I took malaria tablets or antibiotics, I was always sick.
My mom turned to natural remedies to cure me. So I would drink cocktails from boiled leaves of plants, sit under a blanket and inhale the steam of these boiled leaves. I felt much better but the illness kept recurring. At this point, I concluded it was no longer ordinary. I had never been that ill in my life and I’d never fallen ill so frequently. So I told my parents I wanted to leave the village. They argued that COVID was still at large but I presented my case and I leveraged on the fact that people were still moving about. In July of 2020, I left the village for Calabar. After I left, I fell sick again but quickly got better, and did not fall sick again.
Needs Supplied
After giving my life to Christ, the Lord took care of me in ways I cannot fully explain.
The Lord provided my food and water without me having money. Subsequently, I got a job to cook at a restaurant around the time because I didn’t want to rely on old ways of getting money like working for alcohol brands. Cooking large pots of food at the restaurant was a miracle on its own because prior to that time, I had never cooked any food more than 6 cups of rice. The job demanded that I cook no less than 20 cups of rice per time. I remember getting the job and fretting on how I would cook such a large amount of food. I called my mother and sister to tell me how to cook fried rice. They gave me their own recipes which ended up confusing me. So, I prayed and asked the Holy Spirit to please help me. On the first day I went to cook there, I heard the Holy Spirit’s calm voice tell me what to do from time to time. I heard Him tell me to add some veggies to my sauce to improve the flavour, then add the rest later so they’ll stay crunchy. I heard Him tell me ‘stop’ when I was adding ingredients and I heard Him tell me to add some more when it wasn’t enough. At the end of that day, I successfully cooked my first large pot of fried rice. By the next day, my boss asked me what I put in the food because it was delicious and they ran out of fried rice quite early and had to call it a night!
As regards to my feeding, I never took the food I cooked home because I felt it was stealing until my boss gave me permission to always take food home. After I asked the Lord for food one of those days, as I was about closing from work, my boss asked me if I had taken food and I said no. He asked further if I had been carrying food in the past and I said no. He was very shocked and told me to please carry food after the day’s work. He said, “You eat from where you work”. So that’s how I started eating fried rice and ram meat every day with bananas steadily without having money except for transport.
During that period too, when my boss would send me to the market, I would get favours from taxi drivers as many of them would not get money from me or another passenger would pay for me. So I ended up not spending transport to the market. Rather, I would use it for the following day’s transport to work.
A particular experience lives rent free in my head. I didn’t have transport to go to work that day and I decided to leave the house earlier than usual so I wouldn’t be late and I remember walking on the road having this fantastic conversation with the Holy Spirit and I arrived at my destination in 15 mins. It was a distance I should have trekked for at least 45 mins. I was so shocked I couldn’t talk to anybody that day, I remembered chopping cabbages and asking myself, “How?” repeatedly.
The Lord did not answer that question until a year later, around July 2021 when I first tuned into God’s Lighthouse Wednesday Bible study meeting. I had seen the link to the meeting on the WhatsApp status of Sis Aniebiet Umokaso and just tuned in. During the meeting, Pastor Ita mentioned translocation and explained it as one of the powers of the age to come. I was screaming at the top of my lungs in my room that day with joy. I had peace that I wasn’t crazy after all.
After I started tuning in consistently to the livestream, I would hear Pastor talk about the importance of having a shepherd, that is an older Christian (usually one of the leaders in GLH) saddled with the responsibility of helping a new believer grow in the Lord. But I didn’t ask for one until September 2021 and I was given an amazing sister called ‘Peace’ as my shepherd. Sis Peace lived in Lagos and we began talking. On December 25th, she invited me for a December meet-up in a sister’s house. After that, the brethren in Lagos started to meet in the University of Lagos.
After joining the brethren at the Lagos outpost, the Lord provided me with decent clothes through my shepherd. I was used to wearing skimpy, tight clothes that showed off parts of my body that should’ve been covered. As I began to hear more of the word of God, I began to seek to be more modest so I would try to be modest with what I had. When my shepherd gave me new clothes, I was very grateful. When I came to Uyo in 2022, I also had brethren who gave me more decent clothes. The advantage of staying with Christian sisters is that you never have to worry about them compromising on dressing principles. I am very grateful that I have decent clothes to wear that can shield me from the unnecessary attention that comes from being partially unclad. I am grateful that when I am talking to someone, I am not worried that their eyes may wander, there is nowhere for their eyes to wander anymore. Praise God.
An Encounter with a Demon
Another significant experience also happened around the month of July/August of 2020. At the time, I didn’t know what it was but as I came to learn more about the things of the spirit and hear testimonies, I understood better. At the time, I was honing my art skills. So on one occasion, I went to my regular art shop to buy some materials. It was at this shop I met a guy who asked if I was an artist and I said yes. He told me he was an art collector and we had an interesting conversation. We exchanged numbers and I left. I painted mostly at night as it was quite peaceful and I noticed I was able to focus my thoughts better as I suspect it is for most artists.
I was painting one night when this young man sent me a message around midnight. Now I didn’t know better then (based on the parapets that we have been taught to have curfews for speaking with the opposite sex), so I responded and we talked. During the course of our conversation, he asked me to come to his house by that time and I told him I couldn’t do such a thing. He asked why and I told him it was because I was a Christian. Besides, why would he expect me to move about at that time of the night? (Take note that I used to move about at those times before I gave my life to Christ but it felt weird how he sounded almost sure that I would come) I asked if he was a Christian and he said he wasn’t. I asked what he was and he didn’t really give an answer to that but he said that we have been presented with a false Messiah and that I should come so he would lead me down the path of enlightenment. From where I was coming from, the word ‘enlightenment’ was not welcome at all. I started to feel something was up. He began to ramble on about the 7 books of Moses and some other esoteric books I can’t remember now. A few of them I was already familiar with but for the rest, they sounded like really deep stuff. All I could do was laugh. It was hilarious to me because I knew what he was dabbling in and they were sticks and stones compared to the power of my Jesus. I laughed and even mocked him for talking about them. I told him whatever he was reading and believing were lies. Now that I remember it, he was almost entreating me to go on the journey of ‘’enlightenment’ with him. I thank God for saving me from such knowledge.
The next time I would speak to this guy would be a direct confrontation with evil and all of this happened over Whatsapp.
He posted a video of domestic violence where a man used a pressing iron to hit a lady with a caption that suggested that he found it funny and appealing. When I saw it, I couldn’t believe a human being could find such a thing appealing or funny so I decided to engage him and reposted the video with the caption “Who gave birth to this man,” something like that. He was still joking and laughing over it and it was offending me. I told him to give his life to Christ and that finding joy in things like that was not normal, at least that was what I remember saying before the man switched and his demons came out.
Right there on Whatsapp, he began to give details of what he wished the man did to the woman. He talked about heating an iron and searing off her flesh, just very gory things. Then he said he’d wish I was strapped with iron hooks to a car and dragged along the bad roads of Benue and went full-on to talk about the various stages of hell he would enjoy seeing me tortured in. He sent satanic pictures of different demons, like an illustrative picture of hell. After I saw the first picture, I didn’t allow the rest of the images load as I quickly paused them. In all of this, I was just stunned as I kept thinking of what I was dealing with. The time was about 7 pm or 8 pm.
While our conversation was ongoing online, I sent a message to another friend of mine, telling him what was happening. He asked me to send the number of this strange guy which I did. I think he ran his number through a system and found out the name had given me a fake name, so I had to ask him his name again. Mr Strange began to boast saying his name was Tom Marvolo. If you’ve read Harry Potter books or watched the movie (Do not watch or read them!), you would know that Tom Marvolo is the villain wizard who killed and tortured many people in the series. He was quite a wicked guy. Immediately he said this, I realised I may have been dealing with a demon. I was not sure, it was my first rodeo.
He went on and on about things I can’t even remember any more until I recall saying, “I rebuke you in the name of Jesus Christ.” It was like his demons got angrier as I began to feel the rage over the phone. He began to mock Christ and said he would judge me into perdition. I told him he couldn’t judge me and only Christ could. I only wish I heard one of Pastor’s messages on demons, it would’ve been over for them. Truly it is the knowledge of God that enables us to wage better warfare. I can’t remember how the fire got doused but he went silent and didn’t send messages again. I knew it was demons but my Christian friend believed the guy had bipolar disorder, he was just throwing scientific terms up and down. After this event, I visited the art shop on another day and was scared that I would meet the strange guy again. Shockingly, the young man did not remember me at all. He saw me and did not in the slightest make any moves or responses that indicated that he knew me.
Please brethren, the devil is not playing with you. Let’s not be oblivious to the workings of darkness and resort to worldly terms, let’s call a spade a spade. If it talks like a demon and acts like a demon, it is a demon. After coming to God’s Lighthouse, I heard Sis Matilda’s testimony where she cast out a person’s demon over Whatsapp. You can be rest assured this incident played before my eyes and I wished I had done what she did. I am grateful that God used that experience to teach me about the wickedness of the devil and his henchmen, and how intentional he was in drawing me back. I thank God for also giving me insight to what the devil truly wants to do with Christians. If you think you can lust and chase after forbidden knowledge and be free, you’re sorely mistaken, the devil will grab you hands and feet and pull you to captivity. It’s no strange thing that I met this guy who tried to entreat me to lead me on the path of enlightenment, a path I abandoned to follow Jesus. Trust that the devil will try to use the same things you got freed from to reel you back into his arms so he can keep you captive forever. Make the choice never to turn back, the grass will not be greener, at least Tom Marvolo made sure to make that plain to me. I praise God for protection and deliverance from that encounter and for all who are lost in demonic knowledge, I pray they will encounter Jesus, the way, the truth and the Life and follow Him tirelessly. Amen.
Addiction Comes Visiting
After the experience in my room on the day of my conversion, the withdrawal symptoms from smoking ceased almost instantly and I don’t remember having any urges to smoke at all in the days following my conversion. I felt like I had been given new lungs. It was like I totally forgot I used to smoke.
Unfortunately, giving my life to Christ was not enough for me to desist from a habit I nurtured for years. I went back to smoking after staying for months without doing so. Old enemies came knocking and I opened up to them. In February of 2021, I was in Lagos now and I got in contact with the friend that was supposed to be my account ability partner. I won’t forget that day in a hurry as my life flashed before my eyes. I went over to his place at Osapa London on the island in Lagos to see him and he gave me brownies (actual brownies laced with weed). In times past, I could eat it and be fine but I didn’t know I was different now. I ate the brownies and felt fine. We went out to get some drinks from a nearby store and while we were walking I started to feel weird. I tried to pull myself together and ‘keep face’ till we got back to the house but while we were at the store, the last thing I remembered was him reaching into a chiller to get two bottles of Star Radler and walking to the counter. I leaned on him and blacked out. The next thing I heard was, “Give her water, give her water”, “No, give her malt, give her malt” and, “You wan give am beer?” Apparently, my friend was so confused that he tried to give me beer while I was on the floor.
I collapsed and was out for several minutes according to this friend of mine. Even after I became conscious, I tried to get up and go home and I blacked out again. I had to be taken to the back of the store and lie down for over an hour before I could get on my feet. I vowed never to touch weed again.
Later on, I would get into a relationship that was so toxic that it caused me to relapse. It was after that, I came to Uyo towards the end of 2022 and became part of God’s Lighthouse and things really changed for me. It’s now been 1 year and five months since I was high on anything but the Holy Spirit.
I understood later on that inasmuch as I had confessed Jesus as Lord, I had not submitted to Him, and had not done so with those who call on Him out of a pure heart. I thank God for bringing me to God’s Lighthouse and giving me brethren who have helped me stand. One of the words I received during the prayer marathon was Psalm 133:1-2 Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony! It is like fine oil on the head, running down on the beard, running down Aaron’s beard over the collar of his robes.
Deliverances Numbered
When I finally came to Uyo in 2022, my eyes began to open to new levels of truth and I was delivered of many things such as the spirit of fear which was a major thing in my life, I was delivered from rejection, and frequent illnesses. I’ve only treated malaria once since I came to God’s Lighthouse. I began to put on weight and my hair began to grow after several years of stunted growth. I thank God for freeing me from levels of bondage to sexual immorality, lustful thoughts, and all its paraphernalia. I thank Him for purging me of deceptive knowledge and filling me with the truth that comes from Him alone.
Deliverance from Fears
Talking about my deliverances, getting rid of my fears was a gradual process and unique with each notable fear I was delivered of.
Fear had always been a deep-seated thing that raised its ugly head at every opportunity. I had fears of many kinds. I believe many occurrences in my early years were strong open doors to the spirit of fear. The number one open door was horror movies. I remember watching horror movies as a 10-year-old or 11-year-old child. By the time I was in my teens, I had watched so many horror movies and didn’t flinch at what I would call ‘cheap skate horror movies’. I got to the point where I could predict what would happen next in a horror movie.
Another open door, I suspect, was an incident with my younger brother. I grew up having dogs as pets, but I was not too fond of cats. I utterly disliked the way they moved and how they looked. They usually gave me the creeps. One day, my younger brother brought our neighbour’s kitten close to me, and I screamed at the top of my lungs. He didn’t care though because, with every step I took to get away from the kitten, he came forward boldly until I was bending in a corner with my eyes closed, screaming. We were kids then within the age range of 9 or 10 years so it was funny to him and as such, I can’t blame him for the events that would unfold in my life regarding fears.
These two events in my life were strong open doors I believe. Over the years, I couldn’t stay in dark rooms. When there was no light, I always felt this crippling fear and never got up to ease myself at night when it was dark. I’d rather hold the urine or stay till the day broke before getting up. In all of this, I still watched horror movies!
I remember another significant marker in my life concerning fear. I was in pre-degree at this time, and I was done with exams. By now, it seemed horror movies were my specialty, and I binge-watched them. I bought a whole collection of horror movies and sat down to watch them, one after another. Soon after, I experienced something strange that deterred me from watching horror movies. It didn’t matter what time of the day I slept, I began to see dead bodies in my dreams and I wouldn’t be able to wake up from the dream. This happened consistently for three days. I was so terrified that by the second day, I dreaded sleeping, be it night or day because the moment I shut my eyes, dead people I did not know surrounded me.
I called a family friend who was studying medicine at the time, and he told me it was my subconscious replaying the things I watched. But really, the things I saw were not in any of the movies I watched. I tried to explain to him but he said my mind was creative so that it could make up stuff too. He advised me in the end to cut down on horror movies since it was getting to me too much. I stopped watching horror movies after that experience until 2018 when I watched one more movie, and that was the last time for me.
In the years that followed, I was riddled with fears of different kinds. Fear of crossing the road, fear of heights, fear of being attacked, fear of being robbed, fear of being raped, fear of the dark, sudden fear, fear of death, fear of childbirth etc. It was ironic that I was a night owl. I could go out by 2 am even if I knew I was scared of being robbed or attacked, or raped. It seemed I would remember I was afraid of these things when I was on the road, and when there was no turning back. It was an unpleasant cycle.
How I Got Delivered
When I visited God’s Lighthouse in Uyo in 2022, I could only stay for two weeks before I was called back to Lagos to attend to an emergency. At the end of those two weeks, when I was about to leave, Pastor prayed for me. He conducted a mini deliverance on me and rebuked Fear, to which I reacted strongly.
When I returned to Uyo, I went through the Believer’s Bible School, after which I got baptised, and my demons nearly drowned me. During my Psalm 139 prayers (a deliverance prayer gotten from the book of Psalm 139), the leader of the prophetic group praying for me discerned that fear was a significant thing in my life and used the expression, “I saw a hand made of smoke, but its skeleton was made of iron, and it had a firm grip on you.” Another person in the group also said that I had watched many movies. When I confirmed these things, they went into another round of prayers, and the leader specifically rebuked the fear of death (I always thought I would die early, in my 20s).
Next up was the fear of crossing roads. I don’t know exactly when this fear lost its hold on me, but as I continued to obey Pastor’s advice – for us to face our fears, I found victory. Ordinarily, if I tried to cross the road myself, once I saw an oncoming vehicle, I would freeze on the road like a deer. I’ve often done a big piece of stupid on the road while trying to cross. Many times, I would wait to cross with people, and they would have to hold my hand to cross the road. Over time, the fear disappeared. Now I can cross the road myself.
Fear of heights also miraculously left me. I remember walking along Ikpa Road one day, and I looked at the pedestrian bridge and said, “Priscilla, face your fears.” Every step I took on that bridge was filled with trepidation. I was shaking as I climbed it. My heart was pounding as I walked along the aisle, and when I came down, even though I was still shaking, I felt something lift off me.
Fear of the dark and anxiety were usually intertwined for me. Whenever I was in a dark place, I would feel anxiety come over me like a cloak. I remember the setting which I got delivered as clear as day. My shepherd told me to go aside (seek God more intentionally with a partial fast), which I obeyed. I was to go aside for three days initially, but it extended to 6 eventually. On the first day, at midnight, I went into the bathroom to pray and present myself to God, and to ask for His will during my waiting on Him, but I was so crippled by fear I could taste it. With every word I uttered in the dark bathroom, my heart was racing. I had the impression of things watching me from the bathroom window but still, I went on praying (with fear) until I was done saying all I needed to say to the Lord and went to bed.
On the 3rd day, I saw anxiety lift its ugly head and manifest with me fretting over consistent distractions in the house when it was time for me to retreat to study and pray. The thoughts that I was wasting my time and would not get anything out of my time with God were so strong. Then, at night, it was pretty dark, and I had to put on my phone flash for light. As I was about to start praying, my mother called, and anxiety came with full force. I felt anger, hatred, fear, and worry all at the same time. I pushed through and began to pray. As I prayed, I felt my fears increase, and I started to have the impression that I was not alone. I struggled hard to stay focused and began to pray in the spirit. I was still praying when I opened my eyes physically and saw a dark blob materialise, sitting in the corner with wide eyes. It was not taller than the wall socket in the room, and it was pretty ugly. I discerned that it was the spirit of fear, and I closed my eyes again, but this time, I began to rebuke the spirit of fear. I continued to pray until I felt a weight lift off me, and when I opened my eyes, the demon was not there again.
For the fear of childbirth, I remember watching a video of a woman giving birth years ago, and since then, I became terrified of childbirth and never allowed it into my thoughts at all. I harboured thoughts of adopting children instead. My deliverance happened in a rather unusual way. It was like every other morning, and I had just finished eating. I went to wash my plates in the kitchen and I met a brother there who had the habit of calling almost every female ‘Mumsi.’ I told him I’m not his Mumsi, and he said jokingly, “You don’t know you’re supposed to have two children by now? Dey play.” The thought sat inside of me, but I ignored it. I joked back and said, “What if I’m meant to be a Eunuch.”
When I went inside, I could already feel the stirrings, but I ignored it and began working for the day. I’m a feeler, so I usually know that I’m about to have a demonic manifestation by how my body starts to feel uneasy and weird. I began to feel it, but I tried to shut the thoughts out of my mind. I kept hearing, “I can’t give birth, it’s too painful etc.” Now, it was about 2 to 3 hours since I had this conversation with this brother, and it seemed like the feeling was increasing like labour pains. At one point, it appeared the water had boiled, the kettle was ready to whistle, and I was alone in the room. I put down my laptop which I was using to work, and tears flowed freely like I was beaten with a cane. I knew it was a full-blown manifestation, primarily because whenever I manifested during a deliverance session, it was mainly through crying. I found myself voicing out my fears, “I’m afraid of childbirth, it’s too painful….”
I was now in full blast, crying. I had the impression to say these things, “Lord, I trust that you can carry me through the pains of labour, I trust you to be with me, I trust you to keep me alive, I won’t die from labour.” I began to feel lighter and lighter and was able to stop crying. Only about two weeks later, Pastor called for the first Mending Marital Meandering (M3) meeting, and the main focus was fears! There were many deliverances. I think Pastor mentioned the fear of childbirth and I didn’t react to anything during the deliverance session, which was new. I was reminded that my deliverance occurred two weeks before, and I was very grateful.
The Lord has steadfastly delivered me from many fears that plagued me throughout my life, and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay Him for it. All I can do is give Him back the life He has given to me. He exchanged my fear for faith and boldness, and it will only be relevant if I use it all for His glory.
Deliverance From Immorality and Impure Thoughts
Like I earlier stated, I was very immoral. I moved from relationship to relationship and was quite broken inside so I gave out what was abundant in my heart – I would cheat on boyfriends or just have random trysts which I would quickly detach from and move on like nothing happened. It’s also important to note that I was bound by pornography and masturbation. I found that on Sundays when others were in church, I would feel the urge to watch porn the most.
When I came to the Lord, it was one of the things that I lost the urge for immediately but it didn’t take long before I fell right back to it. The first time I ever fell into sin, I knew there was something wrong and I could feel deep conviction and sorrow that made me roll all over the floor. I stopped for a while but soon after I continued and went on for a long time and it seemed at a time, like I never even knew the Lord. I got into relationships again and was living in immorality. I had lost all form of feeling or sense of conviction. However, the Lord would soon discipline me and I thank Him for it. I got into a relationship so toxic that I relapsed to drugs again.
By now, I joined God’s Lighthouse but was in Lagos at the time. For the first time in a while, I felt conviction again. I was moved to tears and I decided I would not indulge in sexual immorality anymore. The following day when I tuned into the church meeting, there was a prophecy going on and there was a warning that if one would engage in sexual immorality again, it would end in them contracting HIV. I asked God for mercy and confessed to my shepherd (I felt so much shame and I felt like I disappointed her in many ways). From that time on, I never indulged in sexual immorality again. When I moved to Uyo in 2022, I spent time with brethren in the family house and many of the things that led me to immorality were removed. I was more accountable to the people around me and I’ve gone over a year without indulging in sexual immorality.
While the physical part of this evil was dealt with, I still had the battle of the mind that I needed to fight. God leaves enemies to help us learn warfare and lustful thoughts were the enemies the Lord deemed fit to teach me warfare with. For at least 10 months, I felt free in my mind and then the thoughts began to hit hard again. It was like I could not conceive a thought in my mind that was not sexually inclined. I would feel the thoughts creep in and dominate. I fell a couple of times to these thoughts and a lack of obedience to the things we have been taught in this house (GLH) with respect to fighting impure thoughts was the reason. We’ve been taught that when such thoughts come, we should rebuke them and arm ourselves with scriptures that are effective towards warring in this regard. I had a few scriptures stored up but not enough.
Eventually one day, I fell to pornography again and I was in despair. I was riddled with guilt and shame but confessed the same day it happened. I prayed and asked God to forgive me but then it happened again and I realised there was something I was not doing right. I repented and did an in-depth Bible study on lust, immorality and its paraphernalia. I was serious because my life was at stake. For the first time, I understood what Pastor had been trying to teach us that we were in a fierce war. I had been overcome this time and the fact that I lost was painful and offensive to me. So I went head to head with my enemy. The enemy became very tangible to me such that when the thoughts came this time, I would say, “You’ve come again?” And I would rebuke it. There were times I was lazy to rebuke and anytime I relaxed, I would be swamped with the thoughts. At a point, I got so tired but each time I went to God to cry bitterly and ask Him to take it away, His response would be, “You have not yet resisted sin up to the shedding of your blood.” I remember responding and saying, “If You would not take the enemy away, then give me grace to fight through, grace to hold out even if I feel my mind splitting, and grace to fight.”
Brethren, the battle was fierce. At a time, I asked my shepherd if it meant that those who were deep in immorality and the like would have to fight tooth and nail to be free? And she said that for one that had gone to some great lengths of immorality, it would demand more fighting. I resolved my fate and decided to fight through. The lustful thoughts would harass me so much sometimes that I would be physically sweating. It seemed like this enemy was at every corner just waiting. Anytime I would ‘’lose guard”, it seemed I could not get a hold of my thoughts. So there was no room for that. I was to give the enemy no room. I would have periods of respite but the battle always raged on.
I felt defeated many times but I trusted God that one day I would be free. It was like God was giving me hope when I came across a testimony on how a brother in church, bro Michael, was delivered from lust. I always thought Bro Michael’s major enemy was anger but I stumbled upon a tract where he revealed he also battled lust. I thanked God for that tract and I kept it safe. Only days after, Bro Michael came and gave the testimony of his deliverance from lust in detail as what was on the tract was just a part. I was filled with so much joy. If Bro Michael could be free, then I could too. His testimony encouraged me to keep fighting. Brethren, listen to testimonies, they are a great source of strength for many of the battles we fight. Nothing beats having someone who has gone ahead of you showing you the way. I grabbed every strategy Bro Michael gave out during the testimony, both the ones I knew and the ones I didn’t and implemented them. From time to time, I would also tell my shepherd that I was having lustful thoughts. I know she was praying for me and I am thankful to her for that.
Finally, the Lord showed me mercy. Pastor began the Spiritual Cleansing series in April 2024. When he mentioned impurities and didn’t talk about it immediately, I was praying and hoping he would talk about lust. I knew that my day of deliverance was near and I was highly expectant. On and off before this series started, Pastor would refer to sexual issues, but I knew this series would be detailed. I waited for when he would begin and when he finally did, my pen was on fire. I listened with rapt attention. I knew the word of God had a significant place in my deliverance and I was determined to receive everything he said. If anyone tapped me at that point, I don’t know what I would’ve done to that person. Finally, Pastor began to pray and rebuke the impurities of the mind and I began to react strongly. Pastor said some of us would have discharges as part of our deliverance process, and encouraged us not to be fearful or worried when this happens. The following day, I took a break from work and decided to rest my head and then lustful thoughts just came flooding my mind. It didn’t come the usual way which was gradual or like it was trying to seep through. It came in a rush, with much noise, so I rebuked it. I slept off and when I woke up, I saw a whitish discharge come out of my privates. I was wondering what it was then I remembered what pastor prayed so I quickly sent a message to my shepherd. I thanked God for the deliverance. Since that time in April till now, I have not had lustful thoughts harass me like they used to. They don’t even come into my mind anymore. My mind is free from impurities! I feel like a wall was put up in my mind so that impure thoughts can’t scale or breakthrough. I thank God for the new stronghold in my mind, which is now firmly rooted in the word of God.
Deliverance from Ungodly Music
I was a music lover. In any place I found myself, I was always the music person. I grew up watching music channels on DSTV like Trace, Channel O, Sound City and the rest. When I was home, I watched these music channels from morning till night and it didn’t take long until I discovered that I could learn lyrics very quickly. When I finally got a phone, I downloaded my favourite songs and trending songs, and would listen to them a lot. I wasn’t like a lot of people who had specific genres they listened to. I listened to anything that sounded good ranging from Reggae, Hip hop, Rap, Afrobeat, and the rest. I also learnt the lyrics of every song on my playlist without much effort. All I needed to do was listen to it once or twice and it stuck. I was the lyric plug among my mates then. Since we were not allowed to use phones in secondary school, I was the one who helped them write lyrics of trending songs.
I also discovered that I had a song for any word spoken. For example, If someone said “Thug”, automatically, all the songs I knew that had the theme would begin running through my mind like one was playing the track. And whatever word the song stopped at, I had another song that I could comfortably sing that started with that word or had the same theme. I could go on and on without exhausting myself. It was effortless.
When I was depressed, music was my comfort apart from weed. Every time I hit a blunt, I would listen to music. Songs are very spiritual as they can deeply influence a person. They bypass a person’s defences and altar their brain’s pattern of thinking. This happened to me when I started listening to Beyoncè. I downloaded a majority of her albums and learnt her songs easily. I could glide from one of her songs to another without missing a beat. She always exuded the boss lady vibe with a significant dash of feminism, haughtiness and sexuality. I embodied these traits as I soon became saucy and prideful. I could sing too so I would train my voice with her songs a lot. I once joined the Catholic choir just so I could train my voice to sing her songs effortlessly. Eventually, I stopped going because my dislike for church superseded whatever ambition I had.
Soon after, I included two new genres to my playlist in the latter years before I got born again. I added classical music and Electronic dance music (EDM) beats to the list and they helped my mind ruminate even further and further. I used them to paint, draw and just jonze when I was high. When I got born again, Sis Aniebiet Umokaso told me to delete the songs and get gospel music to listen to. She shared some songs with me, just 7 songs. For someone who had over 300 songs on her phone per time and thousands of songs stored up upstairs, this was a huge step down. God was very kind to me and the Holy Spirit rode on these songs and I was constantly enriched by them. It didn’t take long until I started listening to worldly songs again but to a large extent, they didn’t feel the same way again. They sounded different.
When I joined God’s Lighthouse, we were taught about the effects of worldly songs during the Laying on of Hands class in the Believers Bible School. We were then counselled to delete these songs and I obeyed. However, it didn’t take long when I began to notice very odd things about myself. I noticed that whenever my roommate in the family house I was staying in would play good Christian songs from artists like Jason Upton and the others while she was in the bathroom, I would feel this very deep dislike for her and the songs. I imagined wicked things like smashing her phone or anything to make the songs stop! I remember one morning while she played the songs, the aversion was like a poisoned pill in my mouth that I could taste. It took everything in me not to say, “Turn off that music.” I spoke to my shepherd about it and she advised that I listen to even more good Christian music, especially the ones from this house (GLH). I obeyed and to some extent, the dislike reduced. Initially I would struggle with playing them. Sometimes I would put on my earpiece and gallivant around my phone, never actually playing the song I wanted to play. The times I succeeded in playing them, I would feel much peace and joy from the songs. I remember listening to one of our songs and I got one of the first extensive visions I ever saw. I began to learn the lyrics of many of our songs and the lyrics of the secular songs began to fade gradually from my memory.
A few weeks before Pastor organised the series “Healing from Oppressive spirits” in May 2023, I noticed an unusual pattern. While every other person would wake up with new songs to worship God, I found that I woke up with secular songs from Burna Boy and the rest, slamming through my ears. It usually felt like my mind was a party ground and the songs went on full blast. I was constantly harassed by these songs. It seemed people were not even free to use certain types of words around me even if they were harmless because if they did, about 4 or 5 secular songs with the theme would blair through my ears. I remember one morning, we were having a conversation in the house and we were just talking about the ‘Truth Behind Hip-Hop series’ and someone used the word, “Thug”. I remember that I stopped talking immediately because I started hearing Tupac’s songs. My brain was like a computer scanning through the list of thug songs I ever played or knew. I left the little gathering and went to another room to rebuke the things in my mind. Later that evening, I met a brother and asked him to please bombard my phone with God’s Lighthouse songs because my mind was under attack. So I got the largest deposit of GLH songs I had ever gotten and began to play them back to back.
On the day of the healing from Oppressive spirits, Pastor prayed about other things but did not mention music. He mentioned other things such as forbidden knowledge, fear, and lust to which I reacted the strongest to the latter two. I wondered about the music issue because I was very expectant that I would be delivered of every single thing. I spoke to my shepherd and she told me to continue to fight it, as it may be one of the enemies left behind to teach me warfare.
During the Prophetic Conclave in June 2023, I fell very sick. I don’t remember ever being that sick apart from the occurrence in my village. During that time, I chose not to take any medication and believed that God would heal me. I remember one day when I felt so sick and I picked up my phone and played one of our songs. Now I can’t remember which one but as the song played, it felt like the illness was being dragged off me. It felt like there was mucus on my body and it was being removed. At the same time, I began to see visions of things that would occur in my life several months after that period. By the following morning, I felt much better though I eventually took medication before I fully recovered. I believe God used the experience to build my faith to trust Him for healing, as well as open my mind to the various ways of His healing.
For a period, the barrage of secular music stopped and I felt relief. However, they came back again just before the Leprosy series season in 2024. As Pastor talked about impurities, the Lord did exceedingly and abundantly above all that I asked for. I received freedom from the barrage of secular music amongst my other deliverances. I realised after the series that I could finally hear songs, good Godly songs in the morning to use to worship God. I found that God would speak to me through songs again and for this I am very grateful. I also noticed that when I pass by places where these secular songs are played, unlike before where I’d start to feel my heart racing, now I feel a reinforcement in my heart, almost like a wall around my heart that keeps these impure lyrics out of mind.
Loving the Word
Although I learnt a little bit about reading my Bible in the earlier times of my being born again, it had not sunk deeply into me and I had not come to understand the value of doing so. I have God’s Lighthouse to thank for that and Pastor Ita. I first tuned into God’s Lighthouse meetings on a Wednesday and the last thing Pastor said during the meeting was , “Read your Bible, read it in huge chunks.” I felt it was a direct instruction to me and from them on, every morning, I would get up at 6am to read my Bible. I did not know how to do a Bible study yet but I read the Bible. I remember one particular event. I had just finished reading my Bible and I laid down to take a nap when the Holy Spirit prompted a question in my head. I decided I would check it later but, it was almost as if I was not in control of my body anymore. It seemed I was still on the bed but my body got up and sat where I normally read the Bible and went to investigate what He had just asked me. It was until several minutes later that I realised that I was no longer on the bed. It was like He blanked me out and propped me up to read and allowed me to catch up later.
Soon after, Pastor brought about a Bible challenge and I hopped on it earnestly. I read 20 chapters daily and any day I faltered, I would read 40 chapters. The Lord spoke to me from scriptures frequently too and began to reveal many things to me. At a point, it felt like I was having an information overload such that whenever I opened my Bible and read a line, I would hear the Holy Spirit explain some things and it was hard to keep up with what He was saying. At a point, once I opened my Bible, I would feel His words come like rushing water and I had to close my Bible. All these things happened while I was still in Lagos tuning in. I experienced the unfolding of the word of God and it built my faith to receive from God regardless of my location.
One Friday meeting, Pastor prayed about mind surgeries. Prior to that time, my mind was always at work. It was only when I was asleep that the voices in my head were quiet. When I lay down to sleep, my mind was as busy as a beehive. After Pastor prayed for mind surgeries, I could no longer sustain thoughts in my head and my mind went quiet for the first time in as long as I can remember. When you’re used to the frequent honking of cars because you live close to the expressway, when it’s quiet in the middle of the day, you feel something is terribly wrong even if it should be normal to have some quiet. I felt something was very wrong with me and I couldn’t place it until we had our GLH December meetup in Lagos. I voiced my concerns to brethren and they reminded me about the prayers Pastor made concerning the mind.
Coming to Uyo was an added advantage as I learnt how to do a proper Bible study. I learnt to do topical studies, character studies and studies based on books of the Bible. I learnt to hear the Lord and respond to His leading regarding what He wanted me to study at the time. Interestingly, He always confirmed it was Him as Pastor would come and talk about the things I had just studied. This has happened more times than I can count. After a while, I could no longer study my Bible as much and I kept asking the Lord for grace to study my Bible again. Soon after, Pastor came and talked about creating new neural pathways by doing things for at least 45 days to cement a habit. This was in the beginning of 2024. I had only one thing in mind which was to study my Bible and I asked with much expectation that the Lord give me grace. He answered me and gave me even more than I could ask or imagine. Rather than study for just 45 days, I went on to have 120 days of unbroken Bible study. I counted it because I wanted to push myself daily. This settled in my heart that it was possible to have a consistent Bible study no matter your schedule.
My Prayer Life
My prayer life took an upturn as well. Coming from a place where I did not pray for a good while, I found myself able to pray more and actually enjoy prayer. Whenever I tuned in, I could feel the presence of God in my room and I would jump in with my two feet whenever worship was on. When Pastor raised prayer points, I would pray along and pray hard. I also found that the Holy Spirit would put words in my mouth to pray right. As I did, they would be confirmed as Pastor would raise the prayer points almost immediately. I was also able to develop the habit of fasting. I would fast every Wednesday and Friday, during which I would spend long hours in the presence of God in anticipation of our weekly meetings. As I heard Pastor talk about praying for other people more than we pray for ourselves, I devoted time to praying for my family members, most especially my younger brother and his friends. Thanks be to God that those prayers yielded fruit as he got born again that same year and as I write this testimony, one of his friends has also given his life to Christ and they both tune into GLH meetings and are hungry for God.
Another opportunity to learn to pray more came up through the ‘Glossolalia’ prayers. It was during this season I learnt to pray in the spirit and hear from the Lord. I received grace to sing and worship in the spirit. I also learnt to hear and pray according to God’s will during the season of those prayers. When we began to pray under the auspices of the General Intercessory Group (GIG), I learnt to pray for others. I learnt to hear God concerning the house, Nigeria and even other countries. Prior to this time, I thought that God would speak to a select few or only a special group of people about nations. I learnt that if we will only come and present ourselves without any other agenda than to please Him, He will speak to us and even lay what is on His heart on our hearts, even about nations too.
I thank God for the different seasons we have gone through as a house as they have been very pivotal to my growth in the area of intercession. The General Intercessory Prayers which involves spending at least 30 minutes daily in the place of prayer has been helpful in coming to the Lord concerning specific matters and in learning to persevere in prayers concerning a matter. As for the Prayer tarries, they have been a huge blessing as I never thought myself to be a person who would be up at night praying, let alone for things that were not personal. The prayer groups during the tarries have taught me selflessness and sacrifice to which I am most grateful. They have also been an opportunity for me to grow in my prophetic gifting as I have noticed an increase in my sensitivity to the things of the Spirit and I am able to discern spiritual things better.
Basking in His Presence
I also developed a deep love for church meetings. As I mentioned earlier, I didn’t attend church for at least 3 years and we did not regularly attend church at home either. I had a strong dislike for church and it was impossible to invite me. But, from the moment I tuned into God’s Lighthouse livestream, I could not hold myself back from attending meetings. I set an alarm every Wednesday and Friday for 4:50 pm so that I would set my corner in the room to attend church meetings. Those hours became holy unto the Lord as even my sister whom I was staying with at the time could not even talk to me during church meeting hours. If she spoke to me, I’d say, “Please I’m in church, don’t distract me.” If I had to hear her out, I would be so irritated as I felt I was missing out on large chunks of what Pastor was saying. During the meeting, Pastor answered questions I had not voiced out, and He confirmed things the Holy Spirit taught me in my private time with Him. I was always elated.
From listening to Pastor Ita, I began to understand why I lost many friends before I got saved. I understood that God was separating me for Himself. In the process of spending much time in church meetings, I wasn’t able to meet up with old friends as much as I thought I would except for one, whom I eventually fell to immorality with. I learnt very quickly not to despise the words of Pastor and repented. I understood that if you give the devil an inch, he will take a mile and I resorted not to give him any chances in that regard. Soon after, I went through my contact list and blocked my old flames.
By obeying, I was free from their influences which came from their WhatsApp statuses. I deleted female friend’s numbers who were constantly stumbling blocks. I also got off groups that were sources of temptations like my secondary school group chat. I’ve been off the platform for years now and I have saved myself a world of pain that could have come through putting myself in the line of fire from the devil.
Becoming a Witness
Another thing that also greatly improved was my ability to evangelise. When I gave my life to Christ, I found that I had a burning desire to tell almost anyone about Jesus which I suspect is the norm for anyone who has come to know the Lord properly. However, I also realised I had this fear of man and would sometimes cower away when I had to talk to certain people. The concept of evangelism was quite foreign to me as I had never been in a church setting that did that. When I began to attend meetings with the Lagos brethren, we began to go for evangelism and I told my shepherd on one of those days that I did not know how to evangelise to people and did not think it was something I could do because I lacked what to say. She told me that I only felt so because I had not practised and would feel comfortable with it soon enough. I never went on evangelism with them because soon after that, I came to Uyo, where I spent a considerable time listening to teachings and getting more and more rooted in the truth.
When we began our IN and OUT groupings where some of us would go for evangelism while others remained in for the church meetings, my name was scheduled to go out twice in a month. I was wondering why anyone would think I was ready to go out to speak to anyone about anything. I have learnt however to trust our leadership in this house and also not be quick to push off responsibilities assigned to me even if I do not understand it. Everytime, I’m given a task to do, even if I do not know anything about it and can be tempted to say, “no, I can’t do it,” there’s always this second thought in my head that says “Can’t you learn?” The majority of the things I know how to do today came from not avoiding the unknown but from embracing it and trying to understand it rather than shrug it off. It was how I learnt Maths and Physics. They were not my favourite subjects in schools and I did terribly at them on my own. Through them, I learnt never to avoid challenges. So I studied maths and physics myself till I could do them, at least at the time (please don’t bring your maths problems to me to help you, you may fail).
I digressed, but that was the way I approached evangelism. I remember my first day out; we were told to go in pairs because two are better than one as scripture says and they have a better report for their labour. We were also told to pray when our partner was speaking so that we could either pick up on something and inform our partner to speak about or just act as a soldier would do to cover a fellow soldier on the battlefield. I went with my partner and that day I remember doing a lot of the praying. I wanted to watch someone else do it first and that was enough practice, at least as God would have it. The next person I went out with said I would speak first when I told her it was my second time out. I looked at her in awe. Inside me, I said, “This girl must be joking.” I was still filled with some fear but we’ve also been told that we only need to step out in obedience and the Lord would provide grace. So I held onto that and prayed that the Lord will give me the words to say just as He has put words in our Pastor’s mouth many times during the church meetings. I asked the Lord to fill up my mouth with His words as I opened it in faith.
When the Holy Spirit highlighted a girl we should speak to, a certain boldness came upon me and my partner didn’t really have to tell me to start speaking. I began to speak and perhaps 1 hour later, I was still speaking and the girl was paying rapt attention. Immediately after, I was so excited as I had just witnessed a miracle. How did I know those things I said? How did the illustrations come? All these questions had one answer. It was the Holy Spirit who prompted my speech. I began to enjoy evangelism and would always want to speak more but I also learnt to give my partners an opportunity to speak too as the Lord also wanted to convey something through them too.
As I continued to evangelise, I realised a pattern that I was always meeting people with a Catholic background, people who read esoteric books just like I did or just people who had a deep thirst for knowledge. I remember a particular Saturday we went out for evangelism and I got one of the clearest leadings to go talk to someone. As we walked out of the meeting venue, I heard the street name and when I got to the street, I heard the house number. As I got there, I encountered a young man who was a traditionalist. For the first few minutes, I was asking God, “Lord, You gave me the clearest leads only to land with this person? What can I possibly say to this person? How do I begin?” The guy was very bold about the demonic things he said and even the lies he believed concerning Christianity such that he didn’t even give me a chance to speak. I was on the verge of panicking. I soon realised that I would have to forcefully take the reins of this conversation and subject it to Christ. I began to pray in the spirit under my breadth and asked for utterance and began to rebuke distraction and anything that would stick its head up to cause a commotion while I spoke. I took authority over the place and when I opened my mouth, the first thing I said was, “I have listened to you, now please let me speak and don’t interrupt me.”
The guy became silent and I don’t know how the words came or the answers to his questions came but I know that it was the Holy Spirit. I remember faintly that I had to talk about Christianity not being the white man’s religion and I had to open a map to show him the origins of the church, how Jesus was probably Middle Eastern and the rest. I had to trace Paul’s movement, marking out areas of the early church and all that. The illustrations came and I found myself using Afang soup to buttress my point. The whole time, the guy was silent and listening. In the end, he let me pray for him and I got some revelations about him which my partner also confirmed. The guy looked slightly humbled but soon after, pride got up and he said that I would soon know who he is. I had the impression that he didn’t just mean that physically, so I told him, “You too, you will also know who I am.” In my mind, “You cannot be threatening me.” That afternoon, when I got home and took a nap, I had a dream and he was in it. In the dream, I was talking to him and he disapparated like how the witches did in Harry Potter. I woke up and I had the impression that he may be operating in some dark power but I did pray about it and tried to follow him up but he resisted seeing me. I wonder why.
By simply yielding to the instructions given in this house as regards evangelism, I have seen the power of God break forth in many ways such that if I were to tell you about each one, they would fill several pages. I have seen the Lord break forth in the baptism of the Holy Spirit, confirmations to the leadings, and in the timely delivery of words in the lives of those who I have evangelised to. I have seen the mercy of God flow through just by obeying the prompting of the Spirit to evangelise. I have seen God bring comfort, hope and healing to people, even to those that despise Him. My experience with evangelism has shown me the tangibility of God’s mercy to people. No one can say to me that the Lord is not full of mercy, even to the rebellious. I would admonish us as brethren to surrender ourselves daily to be the hands and feet of our God on this earth, that just as He has reached us in our lowliness, we will allow ourselves to be vessels in His hands to reach others as well, so that we may all come to a unity of the faith that is in Christ Jesus.
Summary
The Lord has provided for me in more ways than I can count, both monetary and spiritually. I am able to grow in spiritual gifts and fruits that enable me to spread the word of God to those who are still lost. I thank God for his goodness to me and my family, for saving my younger brother and causing him to also give his life to Christ and love the Lord too.
I thank God for a company of believers who have further strengthened my resolve to follow the Lord and taught me many things essential to living a righteous life. Old things have passed away and are still passing away and I’m being made anew day by day.
I wouldn’t have survived as a Christian if I had not come to Uyo and dwelt amongst the finest set of Christians I have ever seen in my life. It is their continuous pursuit of God that has rubbed off on me and drives me to keep pursuing God daily. The ways of God and the reality he presents keeps unfolding itself to me and are more evident day by day because of their passion and faith towards Him.
I also thank God most especially for my Shepherd, Sister Peace. I always had this deep-seated fear of rejection that maybe one day with all my confessions, she would get tired of me and say you know what, “ I am done with you”. For the longest time, if I did anything wrong, I would be scared of speaking to her about them because I felt she would cast me aside or decide to shift her focus from me but she never did. Many times, she always reminded me of God’s love towards His children who came back to Him, reemphasizing what He already said – to those who come to Him, He will not cast aside.
I remember that one of the biggest strongholds in my life was worry. I was coming from a place where I really worried about everything that concerned me, but God gave me my shepherd as a reminder that I should have ‘Peace’. So in the midst of any seemingly overwhelming matter, I would remember, “Peace” and stay put. I remember during the Deeper Waters retreat in December 2022, one of the prophetic words I got was to have ‘Peace’. A completely different person who has no business knowing about these words from the Deeper Waters retreat gave the same words about having ‘Peace’ on another occasion. Throughout my being in Uyo, I’ve been getting hints and glimpses of what my life may be in the future as I choose to follow the Lord and although they are not entirely clear yet, one recurring theme is sure, that I should have peace. That even when judgement comes, the Lord is my Peace; though men will pursue me, the Lord is my Peace; and even in times of war, the Lord will be my Peace. I have come to understand that my shepherd is a sign in my life pointing far deep into my future and when that future becomes present, I should remain in the Lord’s peace. I am very thankful for God’s signs and for His constant reminders.
I’m grateful for freedom from addiction and I pray for everyone who still struggles under the bondage of sin and addiction of any sort: that the Lord will pull you out of that pit and dust you clean of all its sediments, that your struggles will only be but a fading memory compared to the reality of the life in Christ that He will lead you towards, just as He has done for me. Truly eyes have not seen, ears have not heard neither has it been conceived in the heart of man the plans God has for those who love him.
Sis Priscilla O.
7th July 2024
© God’s Lighthouse 2024
