I believe this seed was planted during my junior secondary school years when I chose to make an acquaintance with a new student who had just been admitted into my class. He introduced me to both masturbation and explicit sexual materials within two academic sessions.
This was the outset of my misery and struggle with these addictions. Since I was still in secondary school, the tendency to be absolutely controlled by this evil was less, as access to internet-enabled devices was very rare. These served as restraints, for which I am grateful to God. However, during this period, I was clueless and oblivious to the consequences of continued indulgence in these ungodly acts. With no counsel or wisdom to keep me away, I continued in this ungodly practice.
I considered it a just way of indulging in immorality without engaging in the full act. I didn’t understand that my continued binge-watching of pornographic content would expose me to a distressing spirit, which, in my case, was the Succubus spirit and its attendant tributaries. A succubus refers to a female demon or supernatural entity that appears in dreams or at night to seduce men, often by engaging in sexual activity.
After several years of engaging in these acts, I finally acknowledged that what I was doing didn’t bring God honour and didn’t serve any purpose. However, I realised late, and I was helpless. I was now bound and had become one with this distressing affliction. I sought after solutions to defeat this now-familiar foe. Confession wasn’t an option because I didn’t know anyone I trusted enough to confess to. To worsen the matter, I had never been taught that one could confess and bring to light things done in secret.
Not being armed with the weapons to overcome this foe, I resorted to self-help techniques. I tried the approach of being systematic and strong-willed. This involved setting routines, using filters, and deleting explicit content, hoping structure and discipline would help. Brethren, this approach worked for a short while. I had a burst of energy, with seeming success, but always landed right back in the mud, like a dog returning to its vomit.
This affliction greatly affected my academics. I became lacklustre toward my university education. In my 4th year, I had a very poor result that prevented me from graduating with a distinction. I became depressed, antisocial, always timid, and very shy. I had lost vitality and almost all the good things that the Father gives His children. I was bereft of good counsel, and the majority of sermons in my local church were not focused on making us look like Christ. I knew my chances of receiving help there were quite low.
However, I did not lose hope. I knew that God was able to heal and deliver me—but where and how this would happen was still uncertain.
My Deliverance
In April 2023, I had the privilege of walking into God’s Lighthouse (GLH). After the sermon that day, I confessed some part of my sins to one of the pastoral staff that spoke to me. I knew I had found a Bible-believing church. But even after the confession, I was still one with my woes, though not out of intention. I just couldn’t overcome.
I started attending the Believers Bible School classes, and the Lord began a work of killing the desires of my flesh. I received a true understanding of repentance and understood my Bible much better. Now, I knew there was indeed hope for me, and freedom was nearby. The Lord gave me a new heart. I forgave people who had hurt me and received a garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. I had an extended period of victory, about 3 months, when I practised the things I was taught in this house.
All was good and well, but a lifestyle of disobedience to godly counsel led me back into the mud. However, now I knew I had a fighting chance and was learning warfare. At some point, I became so weak and tired that I couldn’t focus on achieving anything. I knew something was wrong. Still, I kept coming for church meetings.
After completing my BBS classes, I was prayed for during the Sozo prayers, and the spirit of lust, whose bragging right was through the presence of the Succubus spirit, was highlighted. Weariness, laziness, and other things were also highlighted. I didn’t know all these were connected to this spirit’s presence in my life. I was prayed for, and the good Lord in His kindness delivered me. My dreams have become clear and free of any attacks, and I can work more optimally. This has translated into studying my Bible much more.
I want to thank the Lord for His mighty hand and outstretched arm of deliverance that has prevailed over the ferocious grip of the Succubus spirit, its invasive effects, and the damage it caused to my life. I say, may the name of the Lord be praised. Amen.
— Bro UAU
29th Sep 2024
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