Sometime in 2012, I remember preparing for the Junior WAEC examination with my best friend Peter, and then the conversation just went from normal school talk to me trying to get Peter to come to Islam.
Before that day, in a meeting I attended, I heard an Imam preaching that there is only one God which is Allah, that Prophet Muhammad is a messenger of Allah, and whoever does not believe in this will perish in Jahnah which is Hell fire.
When I told Peter this, he told me that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life, and no one can come to the Father except through Him (Jesus). We started arguing about which is true and I wasn’t ready to give in because I didn’t want him to perish in hell.
But Peter was so sure about his conviction, he was certain that Jesus is the son of God. But I thought otherwise…that He’s only a prophet not the son of God!
After our argument, Peter asked me a very important question which I didn’t forget in a hurry. He said that different people were born in different countries, into different cultures and even different religions. He asked, “what if you were unfortunate to be born into an Idol worshiping home, would you still be in Islam?” I told him yes, that I would find a way to still end up in Islam.
I pondered on what he said and knew that I was being a hypocrite to say that I’ll be in Islam irrespective of where or how I was born. I left him questioning myself in my heart, “But Musa, what if you were actually born into an idol worshiping family, would you have been a muslim?”
That was where my quest for the truth began.
As young as I was then, I decided to read the whole Qur’an. We had an English translation in our house at that time and I read it page to page, from the beginning to the end, but I found no light in it. All I saw was deception and no assurance of salvation.
I decided to check out the Christian Bible and see what the Book had to say. I thought it was read the same way with the Qur’an, from behind, so I started with the book of Revelation. By the time I was done, I was so tormented that when I slept, I had a dream where many people were caught up, like the rapture, and I wasn’t among them.
When I woke up from that dream, I felt strongly convicted and I knew that if the rapture happened, I wasn’t going to make it. I cried out; “But I give alms to the poor, I even fast 29-30 days without missing one day, and I pray 5 times daily. When I sin, I immediately say “astagafurulia” and I made sure I say it 3 times. Why didn’t I make it? If anybody should make it, shouldn’t it be me?” I had another dream like the first and ran off to tell Peter everything, even though Peter wasn’t exactly a very serious Christain.
After some years, I was convinced that Islam was wrong and Christianity was right, and I needed to convert. By 2018 I spoke with my dad telling him how I wanted to convert to Christianity. He rebuked me and chased me away from his presence, “not while under my roof!” he exclaimed.
So I held on to that condition, hoping that when I left his roof, I would convert to Christianity. I prayed and asked God to help me find the right church to fellowship with when that time came. I didn’t want to become a Catholic as I didn’t want to bow to the statue and call mother Mary the mother of God, and I didn’t want to follow denominations because the lifestyle of some of the members I knew wasn’t appealing to emulate. (What do you think Amara? Should this
Introduced to False Grace
I had a close friend, Mr. A, who taught me forex trading, as far back as 2016/17. He believed in false grace (Once saved always saved) and spoke to me about it. By this time, I wasn’t a muslim, neither was I going to any church. I had already believed in Jesus Christ as the Son of God, but hadn’t accepted Him as my Lord.
My friend made false grace sound so sweet that I was convinced and wanted Christianity even more because I mean, apart from it being the only true way to God, and having assurance of salvation, I could still sin and the blood will wash it all away.
I really liked the message and I sinned like never before after it. I started smoking weed by late 2020 and by 2021, I became addicted to it.
During the lockdown, Mr. A went full rogue on forex, and by the time we met again, he had made over 150 million. I knew I had to up my game so we went into money laundering. Due to the large difference between the bank rate and the black market rate, we didn’t even need to trade to make money. All we were doing was to send money into the broker’s account using a bank deposit, and withdraw the money using the black market rate. A profit of 200,000 could be made in one day if 1 million was deposited.
We explored the best clubs in town, if it’s not Maitama and Guzape (in Abuja), we were not lodging! We got comfortable spaces to sin with our sin partners back then. I tell you from experience that, that life was not fulfilling.
During that period, I started losing money in the market, but Mr. A was still supporting me. The people I taught forex were making their profits, counting millions, some 3M, 4M. But I wasn’t making any money, so I fell into depression. I already had anxiety disorder before that time, so with the depression came insomnia. I wasn’t sleeping anymore, I was just taking marijuana from morning till night, smoking all kinds of strains of weed, mainly Loud, and managing Arizona when Loud wasn’t available. It became so bad that my girlfriend at that time who was a Christian started complaining and asking me to quit smoking. I’d lie and tell her that I had stopped, while still smoking behind her back.
Sometime between the end of 2021 and 2022, we invested huge money on different crypto projects, and decided to diversify our income. That was the beginning of a major downfall for us. Crypto started crashing during that time and the broker found out that we had been breaching the terms of agreements and froze our accounts which had millions in it with the threat to investigate it. We became broke and depressed, “from grace to grass” we thought.
During this period, my dad asked me to apply for NYSC 2022 batch A, and I told him that I wasn’t ready as I needed to make money before leaving. He promised to give me over 1.5million naira if I decided to go for NYSC as there was some money he was expecting. I still had about 250k back then, so I complied, influenced my posting to Abuja, paid for my statement of result and sped up my clearance. By the time I had gotten everything needed for camp, my money had finished.
When I went back to my friend Mr A’s place, I found the young man reading his Bible. He had become serious with God. When I asked him what was going on, he said he needed God in his life and that he had become born again and given his life to God.
While in the NYSC camp, my girlfriend called to tell me that she was pregnant. I asked her what she wanted to do. If she wanted to keep it, I’d take her to my parents, tell them about it and support her, but if she decides to abort it, I’ll support her regardless. She told me she wasn’t ready to be a mum. That was how I sent her money for an abortion.
While I was in camp, I had the very last hope of growing my account with just about $56 left and a $20k funded account. But due to the guilt from supporting an abortion which I never thought I’d partake in, the insomnia, and the stress of the camp, I blew the accounts. I made rookie mistakes I couldn’t believe I could make. I hated camp and just wanted to leave! I was made the hostel governor and skipped literally every parade and SAED classes.
A Turning Point
But one faithful evening, we were all forced to go for the social night, even those in NCCF weren’t excluded. And that was where I met sis M.O. We got connected by our love for music, I collected her number and we became friends. Each time we met in camp, she would always preach to me. She gave me the BBS audios that pastor taught and encouraged me to listen to them. Each time I tried to listen to the messages, I was usually almost bored to sleep.
And everytime we met, she’d ask me, “Have you listened to the messages?” My response was usually no, but that I’d listen to it.
After I left camp, I met sis MO again. It turns out that we had the same CDS day. The chances that this could have happened was almost impossible because there were 5 other days, but now I believe it was divinely orchestrated. She continued to invite me to her church and I kept postponing my attendance.
I rented an apartment with a friend and one day, we argued about whose turn it was to cook. After the argument, I went to the parlour, spread the duvet on the floor and slept there. When I woke up from my short nap around 12pm, I saw a dark shadow-like being with a double edged sickle. He looked like the Grimreaper. I lay down there paralyzed, unable to move as it was coming towards me to chop off my head. I tried to speak but my mouth remained shut. I called out to Muhammad, and even Allah in my heart even when I wasn’t convinced about them, but the being was still coming towards me.
Then I cried out to Jesus! That was when I regained full control over my body and the being disappeared! It wasn’t here anymore!
… And my salvation began.
Shortly after this event, a few days later, I decided to honour her invitation.
When I went for the church meeting, the ambiance and everything was just so different from anything I had experienced. I immediately fell in love with the people I met. They were just so joyful. I thought, “Is it possible to love God like this?”. Because of their love for God, I was convinced that this was the place God wanted me to be in.
However, I was still in an immoral relationship, and still struggling with marijuana addiction. The difference now was that, each time I fell, I was convicted of sin. I knew that what I was doing was wrong. Each time I tuned in, it was like Pastor Ita was always talking about my matter. I was advised by one of the leaders in the church to drop forex and my immoral relationship, but I thought “why can’t I just do both?” Agreeing would imply leaving my best friend, and my girlfriend, and I didn’t want to because I considered them the only family I had on this earth apart from my nuclear family.
I continued to tune in to the church meetings and on December 31st 2022, I worshiped in a pentecostal church around my house for the cross over night. I was given a sticker which had “Your year of divine realignment and transformation” and Romans 12:2 written on it. I claimed it and vowed to become serious in the new year. The Lord helped me break off from bad company because we no longer had anything in common as I was talking about God all the time, and my bad relationship and realign me with godly company. A friend of mine said one day that I carried my radicalism in Islam into Christianity. I sold my laptop and funded another account to trade with but I lost that account again after all my preparation and effort. I was broken but I decided to continue following the Lord as I had learnt my lessons.
Of course there was persecution from my dad but my mum and siblings were supportive. One faithful afternoon after sneaking out and coming in from church service in Abuja, my dad asked me, “Come Musa, where do you always sneak out to every Sunday? Hope it’s not what I’m thinking.”
I told him, “Sir, I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I’ve been sneaking out to church every Sunday, and I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t know how you were going to take it.”
To cut the long story short, he tried to stop me from going but I told him that I had already made up my mind. I was expecting him to disown me, but the Lord showed me great mercy. But during the early days of my conversion, my dad was always depressed, he even cried, and he wasn’t sleeping or eating. My sister and mother begged me to stop going to church, but I told them that I wouldn’t.
God gave me peace that was far more than I could ever imagine. To the extent that I could pray In tongues while I was in the house with my family. For me, it was such a great liberty to be expressive about my faith.
The process was slow and hard, but the Holy Spirit’s convictions helped me stay despite my hard heartedness. I wouldn’t say I did anything spectacular, I didn’t dig too deep. I just read the scriptures and that’s where I found light.
I encountered many deliverances which began when I started coming to God’s Lighthouse. I started dropping things bit by bit. God delivered me from my marijuana addiction, the immoral lifestyle, the insomnia, the anxiety disorder, from anger and fits of rage. I’m really grateful, most especially for God bringing me out of the darkness in Islam to the light that is in God.
Today, I don’t look like anything I was in the past!
May the name of the Lord be praised Amen.
Bro BMO
5th JAN 2024
© God’s Lighthouse 2024
